Here Comes The Judge...Or Not!

Today's How I Did It Story comes from someone who left a six figure prestigious career to begin a more fulfilling passion. Joyce Averils seemed to "have it all" until one day when she realized she no longer wanted the "all " she had.

Ever since I was 12 years old, I wanted to be a lawyer. In my little girl mind, there were really only two professions in the world: doctor or lawyer. I hated the idea of cutting into anything; and I wasn't too thrilled about being around a lot of blood either. So, lawyer it was. After all, I loved watching Perry Mason and I knew I could do what he did. He just talked and like most 12 year olds, I was great at that!

I went to law school at The Ohio State University and following graduation moved to Atlanta and passed the Georgia bar exam. Talk about excited! With all of the things I've done, passing the bar is still one of the proudest moments of my life.

For the next 10 years I was a trial attorney. I truly loved it! I had found my passion. Nothing excited me more than standing in front of a jury and giving a closing argument. I know one of the biggest fears many people have is public speaking. I’m not one of those people. Standing in front of an audience absolutely energizes me.

A few years later, I was appointed to the bench and was eventually promoted to the Chief Judge of my court, and discovered I loved being a judge, just as much as I loved trying cases. Shortly after my appointment, one of my brothers asked me if I remembered what I used to tell people I wanted to be when I grew up. I didn't remember but he reminded me that I always said that I wanted to be in charge and I absolutely got my wish. My professional life was wonderful. I was living a life bigger and better than anything I had ever dreamed was possible.

But, after 14 years of practicing either as an attorney or judge, I began to realize I did not have the same passion I had started with. The day came when I didn’t enjoy what I was doing. I reached a place where my work was no longer enjoyable but had become a very unfulfilled obligation. The fire had burned low and was about to go out but there was a looming question; how could I leave a six-figure paycheck, a prestigious title and one of the few jobs that require everyone to stand up when you enter the room? Leaving didn’t seem to make sense.

As I struggled with that question, I felt as if I was dying inside. My days were filled with stress,anxiety and less fulfillment. There was no joy in my work and I just couldn't take it anymore. Not leaving was no longer an option but a choice I realized I would have to make if I was to ever experience another career ignited by passion.
I knew within my heart I had entered a new season of life. I knew God had something even bigger planned for me and I knew I had to take the chance to do something with everything He had entrusted me with. So, I retired from my job and joyfully entered the next season of my life. 

Was I scared? Absolutely! But, I knew I had to do something different, become someone different. 

So, I started a non-profit, Changing the Buzz, Inc. which helped inner city middle school and high school girls deal with issues of self-esteem and life skills. Next, I began an online women's ministry, Refresh Your Faith, which focused on giving women of faith a fresh way to connect with God. 

On the latest step in my journey, I entered the world of entrepreneurship. My business is My Second Chapter, LLC, where I help women design an authentic life that gives them joy and fulfillment while they share their gifts with the world. My biggest desire is to inspire them to lead a life that is not happenstance, but one that is purposefully designed.  

When people hear my story, I'm often asked if I miss being a judge. I can truthfully respond that I don’t. Everything I loved about practicing law and being a judge, has given me skills that I use in my business every day – speaking, listening and writing. And, just like I loved being a trial lawyer and I loved being a judge, I absolutely love speaking and coaching. I've found my second chapter to be just as sweet as the first.
Lessons Learned on My Journey:

Dreams do come true.
It’s never too late to dream a new dream.
Give yourself permission to set new dreams and goals.
Living a joy-filled and fulfilled life matters.
Everything you go through prepares you for the next season of life.
God desires that you live the life you were created to live. 

Joyce Averil is a life design and business coach and you can visit her at 
https://www.facebook.com/FabulousYouAcademyByJoyceAverils and http://fabulousyouacademy.com/

How I Did It Stories are part of  FINDING YOUR FIRE the site where those who want to make their passion happen learn how.

SO LONG SOMEDAY

English: KISS playing at Sauna Open Air 2010, during their Sonic Boom Over Europe Tour. Location Tampere, Finland (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Brian Perry is a musician, song writer, motivational speaker and life long believer in saying, "yes" to now instead of "someday"and here's why...




SO LONG SOMEDAY…

When Kathy Brunner was kind enough to ask me to contribute here, she told me that her blog was about people who are living their passions sharing how they got there. I find that a challenging and interesting question because, though I feel deeply passionate about the things I've been honored to do, I feel far from arriving – at least not where I thought I’d be.

I find myself saying “Yes” a lot these days and “Thank You.” I guess I should explain. Late last summer, I got a call from one of my oldest friends in the world asking if I would be interested in helping a company called Sixthman out on their “KISS Kruise.”

Is that some sort of romantic cruise, I asked?
“No, no. The rock band KISS!” he responded.
“Oh…um, yes and thank you!”

Let’s back up a little further. Before this phone call I was in one of those “without a paddle kind of times.” The ones when you’re pretty sure you've found the bottom until it drops just a bit further. It had been a couple of years of personal troubles that became financial that became professional that became spiritual that became personal…err, well maybe that wasn't the exact order but you know the kind of time I’m talking about, right?

Wait. I’m sorry to keep doing this, but let me back up again. I've had the honor of spending most of my adult life touring the United States and serving as a singer/songwriter, motivational speaker, coach, and leadership instructor. I was in rock clubs and theaters, then helping train conference staffs at a burn camp or YMCA, and then I would help design and implement international leadership conferences sometimes all in the same week. All the while returning home in between tours to the magnificent, soulful nation of New Orleans. My life didn't suck, except for the parts that kind of did which led to a couple of huge storms in my world. One was personal and I’ll save and the other was Katrina and, well, that hardly needs any explanation.

So the storms hit with their requisite howling wind, drowning waters, and obliterating fury. Funny thing about obliteration though, it has a way of turning into your favorite gift. It has a way of making way for the best of times.

So let’s make like Michael J. Fox and get back to the future: the KISS Kruise. I said “yes” and “thank you” to this seemingly radical departure from my “regular” life and immediately and profoundly found myself welcomed into the family that calls itself Sixthman. No kidding, companies talk a big game about “family” but  Sixthman is one of the most extraordinary families of passionate folks you’re likely to find anywhere. Fast forward and 6 more cruises, a ski trip, and a fair amount of Cabo Wabo Tequila later I found myself saying “yes” and “thank you” to my friend and colleague Anthony Diaz who offered me the opportunity to formally count myself among this remarkable troop.

Now I find myself waking up in a strange city 500 miles from New Orleans, no tour bus, no Grammys on the shelf (yet) but excited to go to work with people I love at a place that regularly challenges me to keep singing and speaking and touring. A people and a place that doesn't want me to bring anything less than who I am. Go figure.


I’m not going to lie about it. I have found this whole process of (at least for now) trading a touring van for a 401K to be very confusing and a tremendous test of faith. What I’m learning over and again though is that every day, every hour really, brings some kind of opportunity to share the passion that was behind the things I was doing before. You see, it turns out that it really isn’t about what I DO at all but rather it is about who I BE in whatever I’m doing. I can be passion, I can strive to be a light and a loving presence no matter what I’m doing. No matter where I am. Does that make sense?

Now, as any self-respecting speaker would, allow me to sum up a bit more of what I’ve learned or rather what I know for sure.

1. I do not know the Plan
2. I do not know what sh@# means (trouble comes when I think I do)
3. All is well. (Always)

In a nutshell, what I've concluded, as I find myself extremely happy living a life I would never have thought I would be, that my job in living my life is to be really clear with (insert whatever you Believe in here) about what I want my life to FEEL like, what passion feels like to me. Then I must TRUST because what it LOOKS like is not my job.

Finally, I encourage you to get really, really used to saying “yes’ and “thank- you”.

My life is now, not someday. Now. Am I happy about that? "Yes." "Thank you."
SO LONG SOMEDAY

At Sixthman our slogan is LIVE LOUD. So I’ll leave you with that: LIVE LOUD.  No, seriously: LIVE.

Is it time for you to start saying “yes” to things you never dreamed of or imagined?
Is it time to start saying "so long" to your someday and start living today?


For more information check out brianperry.com, Brian Perry fan page on Facebook, and @yesbrianperry on Twitter. Or just drop me a line at yesbrianperry@gmail.com.